Bluebird #4

Every morning I wake with Noodle, my cat curled up next to me. She has been with me for 11 years now. She was my transition cat. Some of you have known me long enough to know I had a previous cat, Livingston aka Stoney, aka Piggly-Wiggly, aka Wiggy aka The Mighty Wig. He was a marmalade tabby with green eyes and lived for 20 years.

When he was about 17-18 years old I started to worry about when he would pass on and leave me. He would be sleeping, a lot as older cats do, and I would think he wasn’t breathing so I would poke him to see if he was dead. He wasn’t and would roll over and go back to sleep. A friend gave Noodle to me when she was a wee little tike. Her name at the time was Sooty… her name has morphed to Noodle (another story).

Back to Wig- Well Wig lived another 2 years. He became playful again and they would groom each other & sleep together on the chair or bed. It was really wonderful to watch. Finally it was Wiggy’s time and he passed on.

So Ms. Noodle has been my solo feline companion for 9 years. She is a very good friend. She sticks by me through thick & thin. She follows me around the house. Sits close by while I work- which she is doing right now. Even when I let her out in the morning to sniff around she only goes out for a short time and she’s right back checking up on me. Some would call this co-dependent. I call it true blue.

Noodle gives me a lot of hope. She keeps me going and helps me adjust my attitude. And so did Wig. I have been blessed with 2 very good kitties.

So today Bluebird #4 landed in front of Cats Cradle Rescue on 4160 Market Street in tribute to our well loved pets. I wanted to bring some hope to these little animals that need homes. Animals have a very important role in our world. They contribute love, hope & joy to our planet.

Cats Cradle is an all volunteer non-profit organization that rescues unwanted & abandoned cats. They have a thrift store on site to help support their cause. I stepped inside to see the cats. It was fun playing with the little kittens. I could tell that all the cats were well taken care of & loved by the staff. http://www.catscradlerescue.org/

Bluebird #3

When I woke up this morning I wasn’t feeling hopeful. I knew the day would come that I wouldn’t be feelin’ it and I would have to work through it. Thankfully I had a full day so I couldn’t pull the covers over my head.

My regular work has gone dormant during the month of December. All the theater companies I work for aren’t doing anything this month. So I have been looking… and looking. I knew December was going to be like this so I have been doing my due diligence for awhile. For the last couple of weeks I spread my search a bit wider and haven’t found anything yet. Thus the reason my hope was waning today.

It’s okay. I know it will be okay. Everything always seems to work out for the best. I have been here before. I do have a little income coming in from pet-sitting and odd jobs. This doesn’t mean I sit on my doorstep and wait to win the lottery (I think you have to buy a ticket to win... just sayin'). I have to get into action. Not to be confused with making things happen or forcing things to happen.

Getting into action means I actively look around and pay attention to the landscape around me and follow my intuition. Do the next indicated action. It gets the Universe lubed. It lets the Universe know I am ready. I am ready for the endless possibilities that could come my way.

So I have been of service to others around me. (That is keeping me busy I’ll tell you!) And this guerrilla project has been keeping me busy too. Where will I put the next bluebird? I let intuition guide me.

Today I placed Bluebird #3 in the community garden on the corner of Chestnut & Poli Street. This corner has been an empty lot since I moved to Ventura 7 years ago until recently. I drive past this corner several times a day and I have watched the once empty corner get tilled, raised beds built, fertilized & planted. Now there is a beautiful vegetable garden. (The funny thing is that the cement peace sign was just laying there in the garden. It made the perfect pedestal for the bluebird.)

It’s exactly what we do with our lives. They can be beautiful gardens of friends, family & activity if we plant the seeds and take care of the plants. My job search is not for nothing. For every action I take: email, conversation, person I help, bluebird I place, moves me forward. This project is helping me as much as it is helping others.

Now it’s coming to the end of the day and I have hope again. The possibilities are endless.

Bluebird #2

Day Two in the guerrilla art world. Deciding where to put these little birdies is an interesting process. More interesting is what to say about it.

Where does Hope live today? It’s hard to be hopeful day in day out, things are happening all the time. Doing this project is helping me stay in hope. It’s helping me to see the positive in people, places & things. It is getting me to sustain a hopeful outlook.

I am grateful I have good health and don’t have to deal with chronic pain or some ailment. There are people in my live who do have to deal with such things. Most of the time they have a good attitude and I forget that they are dealing with physical issues. Other times the discomfort wears on them and I wonder what the hell?! Then I remember how hard it must be to keep motivated & positive.

I know three people in the hospital right now for different reasons but they are laid up none the less. So today I placed Bluebird #2 outside the Emergency Room at Community Memorial Hospital. Seeing a bluebird just before entering the hospital could give a feeling of hope to someone in crisis.

Bluebird of Hope

For the month of December, I have started a guerrilla art project called Bluebirds of Hope. Each day I will place a ceramic Bluebird of Hope somewhere in our town of Ventura, photograph it and then document here. The first one is already out there waiting to be found. I have made each bird so they are all unique & signed. HOPE is embossed down their backs and the date is carved on the perch.

If you find one you can have it or you can leave it for others to enjoy. You can add your own token of hope to sit with the bluebird because hope is contagious. I also invite you to comment on my Facebook page if you have a Bluebird sighting.

So why am I doing this…

Here we are December 2011. There is high unemployment. The stock market has tanked a couple of times to the point where people lost big chunks of their retirement. Foreclosures on homes are frightful with people getting pushed out of their homes. The banks taking bailout money, the US congress misbehaving in an even bigger way. Our financial mismanagement is having rippling effects across the world. Some would say we are going to hell in a hand-basket. AND it’s Christmas time. I have a lot of time on my hands without any theater jobs this month and I want to be part of the solution.

Despite all of this negativity swirling around I have seen a glimmer of light. I have heard several times in different news reports that people who think outside of the box, entrepreneurs & the like are the ones succeeding right now. This is the time when great ideas can be sparked because of necessity. Well that gave me a little bit of hope. And with a little bit of hope, people can be inspired & things can happen.

I was discussing the idea of doing a Guerrilla Art project with another artist. I wanted to put my artwork out into the community as an inspiration. No strings attached: just a gift to the world. I wanted it to be positive, temporary and I wanted it to be a thing that someone could take home if they wanted it.

The idea that art has an important place in our society and can lift the collective consciousness was my goal. I believe now is the time for some uplifting. Finally I thought of something that clicked: Bluebirds of Happiness.

Based on the myth of the Bluebirds of Happiness I decided to use this icon as the image for this series of work. Indigenous peoples around the world for thousands of years recognize the bluebird as a symbol of happiness, hope, prosperity, good luck. This symbol seemed like the perfect mascot to our current affairs in this country but also for the planet.

So today I placed my first Bluebird. I went down to Surfers Point to find a place. There has been a lot of work done along the bike path. I was very impressed with the improvements. As I was walking along I saw a rock sculpture area, you know how people stack rocks into a tower. I always like those. Next to the towers of river rocks was a labyrinth. A labyrinth is a circular path that you can walk to the center and back as a form of meditation. So I walked it and left my first Bluebird at the center rock. It seemed like the perfect place for him.

Tomorrow is another day, for another bluebird and another blog.

Bend with the wind

The seasons have changed from Spring to Summer and now we are in Fall since my last blog entry. Either I was too busy or not busy enough to write.

2010 has been an interesting year... most interesting. Mostly challenging. Like most people- especially in California where unemployment is over 12%, I have been scrambling to make ends meet. The good news is that I have managed to keep my life a float with a lot of hustle and faith.

In order not to loose my mind I have to walk in faith. I have to hold close the fact that the Universal Spirit is conspiring for me and that there is always enough. Things look a little different then they did before. Things are changing and we have to break old patterns- bend with the wind.

There have been times this year when I didn't have work lined up and paying next month's rent was a complete mystery to me. But what I have learned through other tough times in my life is that I am in the "Action Dept" and God is in the "Results Dept".

(When I mention God I mean a Universal Spirit- a power not attached to any religious sect... I say this because I know so many people run when they hear God or Jesus... I know I get a little nervous.)

So when I show up each day and do what is in front of me and be of service to others when ever possible and be thankful for what I do have- I am working in the Action Dept. This means I have to reside in the moment. Stay in today. Keeping fear out... can I do anything about it right now? yes- then take those steps. no- then let it go.

It's all a work in progress... and I am grateful for what I have today.

Glimmer

Today I had a glimmer of hope... that my groove might be coming back... my creative groove.

After being an asshole among friends this morning at breakfast I went home and went back to bed. I thought I would save the world from yet another asshole. After three hours I woke up with these words in my head: What lies beneath the surface. What lies beneath the surface... mmm I pondered this. I don't know what it means but I pondered it...

I headed down to my art studio. A couple of weeks ago I started stretching large woven plastic bags I found in the trash... (Yes I look in trash cans for interesting materials) ...on frames - also recycled and decided to finish the rest today. I have 7. Along with the canvases I have 6 wooden doors - again recycled. So now I have enough surface to paint on that will fill the gallery for my June exhibit... now I have to paint them... mmmm

While sorting the woven plastic bags I started to fold & pleat the fabric. I ended up wrapping it around my dress form and made a dress with a bustle, over-skirt & hat. During the dress assembling I thought "What the hell am I doing? I was stretching canvas now I'm folding & wrapping and digging for more plastic...?!" Ah but then I said " Don't sweat it. Go with it. Let it grow."

So a glimmer I had today. And I feel less creatively constipated. and still I ponder "...what lies beneath the surface..."

Beatness of it All

Wednesday. Hump Day. I am dealing with lack of motivation, laziness and shades of blueness. Where did my inspiration go? Even as I write this I am having pauses of thought. What to say...

Since I moved into my little house I decided not to get cable. So no television for me. Trying to let go of another addiction.

Instead I have been going to our local libraries: The Avenue, EP Foster & Oxnard. There I have found the audio/visual section. There is a plethora of DVDs, Books on CD & Music to borrow. So among the stacks at the library I have been searching for inspiration. It's worked before.

After watching Amadeus 3 times I checked out Cd's of Mozart, Bach, Beethoven, Handel & Vivaldi. A little comparison listening. Very nice. I woke up to Mozart on my clock/radio/cd thingie for a week.

During my commute to and from Santa Barbara I have been listening to books on CD. My current book is "On the Road" by Jack Kerouac, a book I read 20 years ago and was deeply inspired. When I saw it on the shelf at EP Foster I thought it would spark something.

It is narrated my Matt Dillon who has the perfect gravely voice for Saul Paradise. And his voice for Dean Moriarty is spot on. I am impressed with the lyrical descriptions of our country and it's people. And even though it was written in the late forties, these characters are timeless.

The first 3 discs got me all revved up to hit the road. I felt a little spark of hope. I love the road like Kerouac loved it. Minus the booze and drugs. That was what hit me in the following discs: these guys were drug feinds. Dean Moriarty was a whirling dervish in his Benzedrine dreams of jazz.

The other thing that hit me was the women in the book. Their main role was sex toy and caretaker. Barely a sidekick or participant. I wonder what their stories might be. I hope it was more than abandonment and heartbreak. 20 years ago when I read the book I identified more with the 2 male characters. I was driven by the visuals and description of the jazz and the beatness of it all. Now... I guess I still relate with Saul Paradise as a person and his observations but I also see that as a woman I would probably have been one of the girlfriends on the fringe left in a truck stop somewhere on the road.

I also wonder how their road trip would have been had they been sober. Not boring & serious - but not under the influence of booze and drugs. I wonder.

So I am On the Road again, my path, my journey. Looking for inspiration wherever I can find it.